Die, Box Elder Bug, Die

Hell has frozen over. Mommy uttered the words..."we need a good freeze" today. AND she meant it! Why? What has brought the end of the world to the Romney household? Three words...BOX ELDER BUGS. These bugs found Mommy and Siena playing a new game. Die, Bug, Die. There is a spotter and a swatter. The spotter yells out "there's one!" (totally unnecessary as there are SWARMS) and the swatter smacks at the bug at least three times with all their might. This is repeated at least a thousand times before you switch. (In the background, Siena is still playing this game.)

How did Mommy miss this part of living in Salt Lake?! And by miss, we don't mean "pine for", we mean how did she NOT KNOW?! She doesn't remember the Box Elder Plague. It should be listed in the Bible. Sure they don't bite or feed off of food in your house, but why do they want in to the house? How are they able to get in every conceivable crack? Today the back of the house was MOVING. There were thousands of box elder bugs on our back windows and doors. Cello students need a tennis racket to get into the solarium. And when the sliding screen door to the solarium was left open a crack, Mommy did a crazy dance to go shut it. They don't bite, but they sure love to charge a moving object.

Oh and they apparently are big fans of Halloween. Huh? You might find yourself thinking. You're not familiar with the dreaded "Box Elder Zombie"? This is no myth, it's a true story. A scary story. The stuff of Mommy's nightmares. All box elder bugs have a mutated gene that cause them to become zombies once killed. They must be killed three times and then flushed down a toilet or vacuumed up to actually cease any function. BEWARE. I say again...BEWARE. Oh and did we mention the nice beautiful, warm sunny weekend Mommy WAS excited for? SOB. They even turn our most prized moments into a four letter word.